only if we run a train.
done.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
