Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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