This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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