I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
