Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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