that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize