Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
