If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
