i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
