Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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