I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
