idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
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