i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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