Your mouth is God's brothel.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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