I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Randomize
