i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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