please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
