Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
