Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
