Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
They have beer where we have blood.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
