so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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