I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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