Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
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