Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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