So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
