Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize