is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
