On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Randomize
