dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
