one might say we're banned from that church
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
