i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
