Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
