I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Woke up backwards on a recliner
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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