if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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