apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
