I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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