I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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