i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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