Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
