Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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