and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
