I wanna bring you to show and tell
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
