Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
