my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
