hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
