:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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