let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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