As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
May the power of my ass compel you!!
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
