U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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