He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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